Vitamin B-12, Sex & Internal Secretions
by Robert Cohen, Author or Milk A-Z, and NotMilk.com

Warning to my readers:
Today's column contains explicit sexual themes. If you embarrass easily, or if your religious, moral, or ethical beliefs prevent you from reading material of a sexual nature, please, read no more. In today's commentary, I discuss the science of sex in as dignified and delightful a manner as I am able, sometimes using a bit of humor, but continuously recognizing that such concepts may be offensive to some people, so please, if you find such discussion inappropriate, stop reading immediately. If you are easily offended by material of a sexual nature, please exercise the use of your delete button now.

Without embarrassment, this is a subject that needs to be discussed. I am past the point of being disgusted by know-it-all vegetarian and vegan nutritionists and dieticians who believe that one must take artificial supplements derived from cow intestines, containing Vitamin B-12 in order to maintain good health. The fact that vegans have B-12 in their bloodstreams is evidence enough that we're somehow obtaining it. Low dose, high dose, it really doesn't matter. Fact is that we need just a few micrograms of B-12, and a five-year supply is stored in the average human liver. That fact alone negates the scare tactics of those who criticize the pure vegan diet, or dispense supplements as a part of their self-sustaining practices.

Vegan blood contains some B-12. In that, there is no debate. Vegan semen and vaginal secretions contain many times more Vitamin B-12 than does human blood.

The solution? Make love. Enjoy oral sex. The ingestion of sexual body secretions from your lover will insure good health for you.

In addition to the usual frogs, snails, and puppy dogs tails, what are little boys made of? What exactly is in semen?

Ten percent of semen consists of sperm cells, up to 500 million per ejaculate. It takes only one sperm cell to fertilize an egg. I often wonder why the other 499,999 are necessary.

What constitutes the other 90% of semen? In addition to enormous amounts of vitamins, enzymes, and amino acids, semen contains up to 20 times the level of Vitamin B-12 as does human blood serum. Vaginal fluids contain a similar makeup, rich in B-12.

Scientists knew this nearly 20 years ago, but had no socially-tactful way to transmit this information to the lay person. (Yeah, I know, you love my use of the English language).

As early as March of 1984, Carmel Bernstein and a team of investigators published evidence in the Journal of Clinical Investigations (73;3, Vitamin B-12 in human seminal plasma) revealing that blood has one-tenth the amount of B-12 as does male semen.

Eight years later, the Scandanavian Journal of Clinical Laboratory Investigations (Hansen, 1992 Nov;52(7):647-52) determined that B-12 levels in human semen run as high as 20 times that of blood. Similar amounts of B-12 have been found in vaginal secretions.

Second and final warning. For those of you unwilling or unable to discuss or partake in the loving art of cunnilingus or fellatio, read no more. What follows is descriptive.

Many people have an aversion to oral sex because of the taste or smell. Can that often be justified? Absolutely.

Long ago, in the days before artificial modern-day perfumes and deodorants were used to mask human odors, people enjoyed body smells. Don Juan would keep handkerchiefs under his armpits and wave them in front of ladies' noses. That action was designed to bring them to arousal from his own natural essences and bouquet which contained pheromones, chemicals containing natural sexual messengers that communicate instinctual feelings shared by all mammals. Truth revealed: Why does a male dog mount and hump a human female leg, thrusting his pelvis as if in the act of copulation? It's not because he smells your puppy, ladies. It's because he smells your very own pheromones which trigger a genetically pre-determined fixed action pattern in Fido's brain.

On to the olfactory bouquet from your own essences.

Dairy farmers know that if their cows eat onions or garlic less than 30 minutes before milking, those powerfully offensive smells will be included in their body secretions which are then transmitted to their milk. A similar event occurs with human body fluids. You are what you eat. Deer know when meat-eating humans walk into the woods. Vegans have a way with denizens of the forest. Vegans do not eat other living creatures. Deer can tell by human smells. So can dogs and other mammals possessing keener olfactory senses than humans.

For many years, non dairy-using Japanese people called Americans "butter-people," for the rancid smell that would seep out of our pores. I can smell butter people. I am amazed at the number of people calling themselves vegan who are actually dairy users. I can smell the aftermath of pizza 24 hours after a vegan eats one by his or her offensive odor. The mozzarella turns rancid from within. Its smell lingers on a user's breath. Milk the cow and get the garlic or onion milk. Milk the human and get Kentucky-fried chicken essence.

Humans who eat meat ingest large amounts of sulfur-based amino acids. That is one of the qualities of meat protein. The sulfur becomes a part of their own smell and taste. Eat large amounts of methionine and you'll taste quite rancid.

I have met many vegans who relate anecdotal evidence of how other vegans make better lovers because they "taste better." Where are Masters and Johnson when you need them? The good that comes from this column will result in two lovers enjoying a large meal of fresh pineapple before their next bout of foreplay. Gourmets and epicurians of the world, unite. Your next dose of love will contain the best vitamin pill in the world. Was it Mary Poppins who sang, "Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down"?

Remember, for B-12, make love, and do so with good taste.